Wheres the Summer gone?

Bloody global warming! I was hoping for a nice hot summer but we end up with the wetest June on record. This had better pick up in July other wise mother nature is going to get a swift punch in her tit.

It's Summer Again

It's getting hotter by the day so I guess Summer is here. The worst thing about it is having to work, We should all have the summer off or better still a four day week. Let's all have Friday, Saturday and Sunday off. Also I hate the sleepless nights covered in sweat, apart from that the long days are good and having a beer in the early evening is nice. Ahhhh you have got to love the summer.

Bamboo!

Just bought myself a luvvly little gadget from Wacom (a Bamboo graphics tablet) and I must say it is a very nice piece of kit for the price (around £70).

http://www.wacom-europe.com/bamboo

The 'mouse mode' works really well when browsing the web!

Abracadabra

Supermarket Sweep!

Missed me? Well, maybe not... In the meantime, please can someone tell me why I find this picture so inviting?

Abracadabra
Still coding away...

Big Brother Controversy Again....

So Emily has been kicked out for using racist language. In my opinion BB made the right decision, but this kind of language is used all the time by young black people and gangsta rappers. I find that offensive so why aren't we kicking up a fuss about that. Another point is that ginger people are constantly abused about the colour of their hair, also fat people, smokers, Welsh, Irish and Scottish people are picked on but that's acceptable. It reeks of double standards.

10 Annoying Things About The Jeremy Kyle Show

If you live outside the UK you probably won't have heard of him. To sum him up he's a "Happy Shopper" version of Jerry Springer. Cheap, looks crap and not as good as the more established brands.

10 Annoying Things About The Jeremy Kyle Show

1. Jeremy Kyle

2. "Isn't she brave ladies and gentlemen?" No shes not Jeremy, she's a fat slag with five bastard kids who allowed some missing link to blow his beans up her.

3. The way he preaches in such a self righteous way, "You had an affair!" Well Jeremy isn't it true you shacked up with some tart behind your wifes back?

4. Shouting "...That's a FACT!" at the end of every sentence, even when the context makes no sense e.g. "Why don't you get a job? That's a FACT!" (Er...no it isn't, Jeremy, it's a question!

5. Grabbing every opportunity to tell stories which he believes show him in a good light "I used to drive all night to see my kids without any sleep" without ever stopping to think that he actually comes out of it rather badly...what about all the other motorists on the road whose lives were endangered by his sleep-deprived driving?

6. His inability to understand the concept of the phrase 'The lie detector is 96% accurate'. This means 1 result in 25 could be wrong, but this doesn't stop him from treating the piece of paper in his hand like the Magna Carta. The closest he comes is sarcastically telling the alleged liar "Oooooh, so I suppose you're one of the 4%?" Well, yes. They could be. But then to admit that does rather urinate on Jerry's next angry rant. Speaking of which:

7. Telling naughty guests "I'm going to give you both barrels" as if he's Charles Dickens promising an audience another master work, rather than a rabble-rousing daytime TV ringmaster stating the bleeding obvious, remembering to build a crescendo in the last sentence so his lackeys in the audience know when to applaud.

8. I loathe (but perversely look forward to) Mr Kyle berrating the guest villain (usually absent father/drunk mother etc) then when they burst into tears I HATE it when he says 'I know underneath it all you are a good person.....' No he's not, he's a jobless weed smoking cock who has never and will never contribute to society.

9. It's on my telly

10. "Look at me ...Look at me ...Look at me ...Look at me!"

I can't take total responsibility for this entire top 10, I got a few from a digital spy forum, but they were too good to leave out.

The Amazing Jonathan

It's not often I watch a Magician and go wow! but this magician is a little bit special. I bought tickets to go and see this guy in Las Vegas. Unfortunately I went through the wrong door and sat in the front row and to my surprise I ended up watching "The Crazy Girls". My girlfriend wasn't too impressed. In case you didn't know the Crazy Girls are strippers.

Change Your Lifestyle

These change your lifestyle programs when some skinny litlle pretty boy twat who has never been fat in his life preaches to people the size of small houses about eating the right kind of food and doing exercise. I wouldn't mind the advice but it's the patronising way that they do it. "Look at this burger, that's death on a plate", we know fatty food is bad for us, we know that cigarettes are bad for us and we know that alcohol is bad for us but it tastes so fucking good. A Big Mac, lambert and Butler washed down with a Southern Comfort and lemonade, theres nothing better. Problem is I keep getting these chest pains ....... and a pain down my arm........ughhh.......ahhh..........(slump)